Two more chuckles

Two more chuckles for today, from Krystyna and Stan (taken from "It Is What It Is"). --SMK

From Henny Youngman:

Do you know what it means to come home to someone who loves you? To come home to someone who feeds you and cares for you? It means you're in the wrong House!


From "Parade Magazine" December 21, 2003:

Do you know the joke about Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates?

Well, one day there's a particularly large number of saints waiting to enter Heaven. Saint Peter, of course, has to check their credentials one by one, and that takes hours. But these being saintly people, they all wait very, very patiently.

Then, all of a sudden, out of the blue, someone wearing a white coat with a stethoscope in his pocket jumps the line, walks to the front of the queue and breezes in through the Pearly Gates.

One of the saintly people approaches Saint Peter and says, we've waited a long, long time, and then all of a sudden that guy wearing a white coat with a stethoscope in his pocket just walks past you right into Heaven. What's that about?

Oh, Saint Peter replies, That's God. He thinks he's a doctor.